Steal the Cookie 2: The Sequel!

[Boingo the Clown]

I eat the bad clone cookie ... then use mouthwash.

I then transform the cookie into a grain of sand. I mix it into more sand, and melt it all into glass!

I then use the glass to make thousands of Coke bottles, fill them with Pepsi (because I am mean that way), and send them to vending machines all around the world!


MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[Drwalrustein]

I go back in time knock you out take the cookie throw to cookie monster to guard it.

[Awesomedude249]

I then tell cookie monster he has to go film a segment about how to not eat healthy, so he leaves, therefore, leaving the cookie unguarded. I then take the cookie and put it in with OVAR 9000 other cookies that look exactly the same, taste the same, have the same chocolate chip array, and are virtually indistinguishable from the original cookie.

[Drwalrustein]

I used the cookies ID and call his name he comes to me I put it in a space shuttle with astronauts and alien ufos circling it.

[Boingo the Clown]

I reprogram the OVAR 9000 to find the cookie for me.

With the cookie in hand I retreat deep into a cave hidden on a planet near the edges of space, so distant that even I do not know where it is.

[Drwalrustein]

I used the cookie tracker 10000000000000000 to find it and put 1,000,000,000,000,000 decoys of myself eating the cookie

[The Doctor]

Luckily, I implanted a tracking chip in the cookie when I had it, so I take the cookie, then cover it in millions of tiny red-hot needles.

[Awesomedude249]

I steal the cookie, I use a cloning machine to clone the cookie, then I clone it thousands of times. I then eat all thousands of cookies except the original. I then put the cookie in The Pit (from Edgar Allen Poe story "The Pit and The Pendulum") And anyone who goes in gets Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicavolcanoconiosis.

[Boingo the Clown]

Luckily, I have read The Pit and the Pendulum and I know the walls of the torture room are metal with hinges at the corners, so I undo the hinge pins at one corner and open up the wall, gaining easy entry into the torture room. I am also aware that the rats in the pit are attracted to the spicy meat the inquisition leaves out for the prisoners (The protagonist of the story escaped from the pendulum by rubbing some of the meat on the ropes holding him down, and the rats chewed through the ropes.), so I place a pile of the spicy meat in one corner of the torture room, and when the rats come out of the pit to eat the meat, I safely repel down into the pit, retrieve the cookie, and climb back out.

Since the inquisition was defeated by the French at the end of the story, the building housing the torture room is now abandoned, and I am able to leave unopposed.  (I take a moment to take photos of all the demonic statues cast into the walls of the torture room before leaving, including the big one of Death on the ceiling, and post them on Facebook.)

I have the cookie digitized and place it deep inside the mainframe, protected by Tron.

[Drwalrustein]

I hack into the mainframe take the cookie make cthulu the destroyer protect it.

[noob1234]

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1KxzJNiGao" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1KxzJNiGao</a>

[Boingo the Clown]

While noob1234 is laughing at the death of Cthulu, I grab the cookie and spirit it away to Los Angeles.  I place it under the footprints of the greatest actor in history outside Grauman's Chinese Theater.  I won't say which actor that is, and the rest of the footprints are all booby trapped with high explosives!

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVY1-v97Mic" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVY1-v97Mic</a>

[The Doctor]

I take the cookie from underneath Marlon Brando's footsteps (tossing a rock onto Denzel Washington's just to make sure) and coat it in wax, then put it in a hydroflouric acid bucket.

[Boingo the Clown]

I drink the hydrofluric acid (Mmmm! Tangy!) and force feed the wax encrusted cookie to a sperm whale.  Within days the cookie is at the centre of a growing ball of ambergris and old squid beaks, and, of course, a large angry whale.

BTW: Hunting whales is illegal. 

[noob1234]

BTW: Hunting whales is illegal. 

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyxLGSMtqtM" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyxLGSMtqtM</a>

I bribe some people with experience with these things to come hunt the whale for me.
Then we extract the contents of its stomach, and since the cookie is indestructible, we incinerate the contents, leaving just the cookie.

I hide the cookie aboard a Borg vessel.